First of all, let me start with a truth. In my mission statement for this blog, I promised to keep it real. I have struggled this month to get my proverbial shit together. With the holidays, end of year stuff, end of semester school stuff with the kiddos, etc. I have had a hard time sitting down and putting my thoughts on paper. Today I finally feel the creative juices flowing so here I am. I promise to do better next month. This is real life y’all and proof that intentions and best laid plans don’t always get executed as intended. Know what I should have done…..reach out and talk it through with my mentor! This is a perfect example of where a mentor could have helped me! Practice what you are about to preach, Angela!
In this month’s blog I am drawing inspiration from the Dr. Seuss book, Are You My Mother? I assume most of you have read the story. If not, the story is about a baby bird who hatches from his egg to find himself alone in his nest. He wanders from animal to animal looking for his mother to no avail. The kitten, the hen, the dog, the cow…. Were not his mother. While on his mission, the baby bird says:
“I have to find my mother! He said. But where? Where is she? Where could she be?”
Finally, he returns to his nest, and shortly thereafter, to his relief, so does his mother. Why is this relevant? Because that baby bird needs his mother to nurture him, teach him, guide him, show him how to find food, much like we all do in our careers. We all need guidance.
As you navigate your career, no matter where you are in that journey, having a mentor is critical to success. No matter if you are an entry level clerk or a CEO, we don’t, and never will, know everything, or know how to handle every situation. As I stated in my November blog, What am I Worth?, I often consult my trusty Merriam-Webster dictionary to give me perspective on words or topics.
Merriam-Webster defines a mentor as:
A trusted counselor or guide
So how do you find a mentor? Can you or better yet, should you, have more than one mentor? What is the purpose of a mentor? I will also talk about some of my experiences with mentor relationships that worked and those that didn’t. That’s right, not everyone is a great mentor or your mentor might not be a great fit for you!
In a previous company, the senior leadership team implemented a mentor program. It was well thought out, rolled out well, and the employees were very excited about it. It failed miserably, and I believe I know why! Employees submitted “applications” to be either a mentor or a mentee. The steering committee then assigned mentors to the mentees from the applications. In my experience, a mentor and a mentee cannot be assigned, they must naturally find each other due to common interests, experiences, backgrounds, character traits, i.e. the relationship must be organic. The relationship must be built on trust. How can a mentee solicit career advice from a mentor they don’t fully and completely trust? The mentor/mentee relationship should be confidential unless both parties agree that topics can be discussed elsewhere.
Mentors can help their mentees in a variety of ways. A mentor can offer their mentee valuable professional advice, such as ways to advance in their career, how to improve their resume and practice for interviews, or how to manage difficult situations or coworkers. Mentors can answer questions about their field and challenge their mentees to think critically about their career paths. Usually established as more senior members of an industry, mentors are well-situated to help mentees consider their long-term development. They can also provide concrete benefits by serving as a reference or utilizing their network to help a mentee obtain a new role.
There are multiple types of mentors that you may find helpful. The need for any type of mentor may come and go throughout your career and your life. Here are some examples:
Peer mentor – think about starting a new role at a new company. A peer mentor is possibly someone that’s in that role or has held that role previously that can help you navigate the expectations, teach you the ropes, someone you can ask those “dumb questions” to, that’s not your boss, they can help you navigate pitfalls, learn the lingo, someone on your level that you can bounce ideas off of, etc. This person can be invaluable when starting out in your career.
Spiritual mentor – at different points in your life and your career development you may question your spirituality or how your faith intertwines with your career. The two may even conflict at times. One role of a mentor may be to point out the hard truths or hard lessons in a nurturing way. This is why trust is so important in a mentor/mentee relationship.
Career mentor – Career mentors tend to be in a higher position than their mentees and serve as career advocates and guides. Career mentors can help their mentees understand how their current roles could progress. While career mentors are sometimes their mentee’s managers, they can also be based in a different department of the company. Typically, career mentors check in with their mentees on a less frequent basis than peer mentors. There is no defined timeline for interaction with any type of mentor, the frequency is totally based on the situation, the people, and the needs. There is no right or wrong answer. This is the mentor that I rely on the most. I met my career mentor very early in my career, we worked together for about 15 years and then I made a career change. Our relationship has ebbed and flowed but he is someone I have counted on throughout my career.
Life mentor – Life mentors are usually at the senior stages of their career and may work within or outside of the mentee’s current company. Life mentors can offer advice during difficult career decisions, such as helping mentees decide to leave a job or change careers to find a new position. They can also be a valuable source of confidential and unbiased information. I believe this is an important relationship for women. There are many life changing events that happen in a woman’s career that may require guidance. How to navigate a career and becoming a first-time mom, for example.
I am sure there are many additional types of mentors that could be discussed and really that is up to you to define what you need and what a mentor could help you with. Not only did I need a mentor, and do need a mentor, but I love being a mentor. I learn things every time I meet with a mentee. I love problem solving, sharing my experience, and collaborating. Serving as a mentor has helped me improve my professional networks and has helped me to reinforce my skills and knowledge. Being a mentor has also helped me to stay connected with new information and trends within my industry, especially with the youger generations. I love to see the results as well.
I mentioned above the importance of trust in the mentor/mentee relationship. There are also other requirements of both parties to ensure a successful working relationship. The mentee should be engaged and actively participate, they must be open-minded and open to new ideas, and they must be respectful. Have you all heard the saying “feedback is a gift”? Your mentor should provide you feedback, whether it be on an idea, or maybe they sat in on a meeting and watched you in action, honest feedback is the key to growth, you must be willing an open to hear it and digest it. You may not take action on every bit of feedback you ever receive but you should take it seriously and consider it.
Mentors, on the other hand, should be good, active listeners, they should have expertise in the areas of which they are providing guidance, and they must be able to communicate openly and honestly. A mentor needs to understand how to listen and really hear what the mentee is struggling with in order to be able to help them. Open and honest communication is so important in proving that feedback that we talked about. For so many years in my career I would “sugar coat” feedback. That was not helpful to anyone, you cannot fix what you don’t know or don’t understand is broken.
I was once asked by a coworker in a different department if I would be her mentor. I was thrilled. It was a member of our sales team and not someone I got to work with on a day-to-day basis. We met the first time and talked about what she was struggling with and how I could help her. I listened and believed I understood what she needed. We talked about some things she could try and when might be an appropriate time to try them. We met a few times after that and discussed what worked and what didn’t and why they might have worked or not. Then she started missing meetings, not calling into scheduled calls with no notice or explanation. I was very disappointed and did not understand. I thought maybe I had done something wrong or provided guidance that wasn’t successful. This is why open communication is so important. I feel a mentor should challenge a mentee, and may at times make them uncomfortable if they push them out of their comfort zone but neither should feel like it is something they have to do. If you have a conflict or simply don’t feel that you need to meet at a preset time, be open, be honest. “Hey I am feeling great about this and don’t feel like we need to meet” or “Hey, I have a high priority deadline approaching and don’t feel like I have the time to commit right now”. THAT’S OK! The relationship kind of fizzled out, maybe she didn’t feel like I was the right mentor for her or maybe she didn’t need me anymore, either way I went home and made gingerbread cookies!
Bottom line: We all need help and guidance. Find someone you trust and can communicate with that can help you navigate different aspects of your life. Be comfortable be a little uncomfortable, be open to change, it’s the only way we can grow!
The History of Molasses
Molasses has a rich history that dates back to ancient civilizations. Its early origins can be traced to Southeast Asia, where the sugarcane plant was first cultivated. The production of molasses began when sugarcane juice was boiled down to create a thick, dark syrup. As trade routes expanded, molasses made its way to the Middle East and then to Europe, where it became a popular sweetener in cooking and baking.
In the 17th and 18th centuries, molasses played a significant role in the Trans-Atlantic slave trade. It was a crucial component of the infamous triangular trade route, as it was used to make rum in the Caribbean, which was then traded for slaves in Africa. This dark chapter in history underscores the deep cultural and economic significance of molasses, while also highlighting its pivotal role in shaping global cuisines.
Overall, the early origins of molasses are deeply intertwined with the historical movements of people, goods, and culinary traditions. As molasses traveled the world, it left its mark on a variety of dishes, including the beloved molasses cookies that continue to be enjoyed today.
Molasses, the dark and sweet syrup, has been a staple in baking for centuries. Its introduction revolutionized the world of baking by adding depth, color, and complexity to a wide range of delicious treats. In the baking world, it was initially used as a sweetener before the availability of granulated sugar. Early bakers recognized that molasses added a unique flavor profile to baked goods, making them richer and more flavorful.
During the colonial era in America, molasses became even more popular in baking due to its accessibility and affordability. Bakers began incorporating molasses into various recipes, including bread, cakes, and cookies, leading to the creation of the beloved molasses cookie. This versatile ingredient had a considerable impact on the development of baking traditions, and its historical significance continues to be celebrated in modern culinary practices.
Molasses cookie recipes have evolved over the years, reflecting changes in ingredients, baking techniques, and cultural influences. In the early days, molasses cookies were simple and oftentimes made with just a few basic ingredients such as molasses, flour, butter or lard, and spices like ginger or cinnamon. Over time, as baking methods improved and trade routes opened up, the recipes became more refined and diverse.
As European settlers brought their baking traditions to the Americas, molasses cookies began to incorporate ingredients like nutmeg, cloves, and allspice. The addition of these spices added depth and complexity to the flavor profile of the cookies. With the industrial revolution, the availability of ingredients expanded, leading to variations in molasses cookie recipes that included ingredients such as raisins, oats, and even chocolate.
Molasses cookies have a rich history in America, dating back to the colonial era when molasses was a widely available and affordable sweetener. It is believed that the early American colonists adapted molasses cookie recipes from their European ancestors, infusing them with the flavors of the New World. Molasses cookies became a staple in American households, especially in the northeastern region, where molasses was a popular ingredient due to its long shelf life and versatility in baking.
During the American Revolution, molasses cookies served as a convenient and long-lasting food source for soldiers on the battlefield. Their durability made them ideal rations for troops, and they became a symbol of patriotism and resilience during challenging times. As the nation continued to evolve, molasses cookies remained a beloved treat, cherished for their comforting, nostalgic flavors and the sense of tradition they carried. Today, molasses cookies continue to hold a special place in American culinary history, symbolizing resilience, resourcefulness, and the enduring legacy of early American baking traditions.1
My earliest memories of molasses cookies are from visits to see my great grandmother. She lived in an apartment in Bucksport, Maine and we would visit her every Saturday. She would always have the Lawrence Welk show on the television and a tin of homemade molasses cookies on the kitchen counter. Let me tell you the secret to a good molasses cookie, you MUST sprinkle sugar on the top and they must be soft. There are regional variations to the molasses cookie in the United States and her recipe is not typical of a Northeastern molasses cookie. Typically, the northern cookies are harder, more like gingersnaps, and the southern molasses cookies are softer. Not sure where she got her recipe from but they are amazing and I am excited to share it here with you! Fun fact – my mom got her middle name from my Nana Gross, I got my middle name from my Nana Gross, and my oldest daughter got her middle name from my Nana Gross. A molasses cookie recipe AND a middle name! The middle name is Faustina by the way! This recipe is one of my favorite possessions as I have it in my moms handwriting on a stained piece of paper that shows how well loved it was by our family.
Molasses Cookies
½ C sugar
½ C molasses
½ C shortening
½ tsp ginger
½ tsp cinnamon
1 tsp vanilla
1 tsp baking soda
½ tsp salt
½ C sour milk
Mix all together
Slowly add 2 ½ C flour until well mixed
Refrigerate the dough for 2-4 hours
Roll out onto a floured surface and cut into desired shapes with a cookie cutter or glass
Sprinkle sugar on top of each cookie
Bake at 350o for 8-10 minutes until bottoms are golden brown
Note: Can be cut into gingerbread shapes and decorated for Christmas cookies!
1 Delicious History: Uncovering the Origins of Molasses Cookies – FlavoryCooking
Recipes From the C-Suite 
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